Chivalry is not dead.....

So, why do people cheat? I've been asking around lately to figure it out. Honestly, there are so many reasons, well, excuses actually. I'm just amazed that people are not taking marriage more seriously. It's become a thing of, who's wedding was bigger, or who had the best reception. It's not even about the couple anymore.

I've been told things like, "well, she pissed me off so I slept with someone else", or "our marriage sucks...they're not giving me what I need at home." Are these really excuses or does it all come down to a lack of self control? I've been in bad relationships that went on for years but I never cheated. I'm not going to say I have never cheated, but, I don't make it a practice and I never felt good about myself after the fact.

I talked to someone just the other day who said that their spouse never made them feel loved or appreciated. Literally hit them after a days work to get up and do things around the house. I'm sorry, but isn't that a sign that something is not right? Seriously, if I'm out working and I come home and rest, and someone put their hands on me and told me to do more work, I would have come unglued and been all over them like a spider monkey jacked up on Red Bull. But this person tolerated this, and still does, because of the child. Ya know, there has to be a line drawn somewhere. Kids are not blind. They may not tell you that they see that you are unhappy or maybe they're brainwashed into believing that this IS the way marriage is supposed to be. This is setting a bad example. Don't you want your children to see what a real marriage and real love is? Don't you want them to see that they don't have to settle for a loveless relationship? Everyone deserves to be loved. If you're with someone that you really don't love, then let them go. Let them experience love with someone who is willing to show them and willing to tell them the sun shines out of their ass!! (love that quote from "Juno")

People are selfish. They get comfortable in a relationship whether it's a good one or a bad one. Nobody wants to do the whole dating thing again. Nobody wants to pack up and move out and set up a new life. They would rather stay in a fucked up marriage, pretend there is nothing wrong and live like this forever. Nobody likes change.

Personally, I would rather pack up, move out and start a new life and hope to find someone who when I pull in the driveway from being gone five minutes to run to the store has that look in their eye like they've missed me like I was gone for a week. Or that would hold my hand watching a movie sitting on the couch. Chivalry is not dead. There are men on this planet who still believe in old fashioned love... true, honest, caring and devoted men. And women.

I've said enough.

Are we just looking in the wrong place? Are we just settling because we don't like change? Do we tolerate to keep peace for the kids? Who's right? Who's wrong? I just know that it pains me to see good people being hurt because the other person has no self control or just doesn't give a shit.