Poof!!! Be gone!!!

Really???
What ever happened to R-E-S-P-E-C-T??
How can people be so cruel? So disrespectful? So dishonest?  Oh, wait, I know...... they have no conscience!
Sorry guys, it's another man-bashing blog! But, not all men (YOU know who you are!) are like that! I know!
How can a man lie, cheat and steal from someone that they supposedly love? Who does that? I mean, you kiss someone and tell them that you love them while all along, you are cheating? Kissing another woman with those lying ass lips? Do you have no couth? This is why men get judged before women get to know them.  See how one douche bag can ruin it for everybody?
How can a man sit back and watch someone try their best to provide for everyone while THEY are out pursing their passion, while not providing ANYTHING??? Then, when they feel like they need to move on and get it somewhere else, they wait until the coast is clear, go in and STEAL things that they know they didn't deserve in the first place and not even leave so much as a "fuck-you" note? No balls!!! But to this I say, take your parting gift and get the 'eff out already!!!
I personally have had an Epiphany this week!! Oh, here's the definition in case that word is too big for you: 
a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.
If you think negative thoughts, only negative junk will come into your life!! This week, I've realized that I deserve ALL GOOD THINGS and when I think positive, positive things come into my life!! I have reconnected with people from my past that have really made me realize that I deserve good things in my life and I am extremely happy!!!
So take your THINGS and move on!!!!! Hope you and your TV will be happy!!!!

Me... turning into a marshmallow?

According to my good friend, we'll call her "J", I've become a "softy".... losing my edge.... my razor sharp tongue has been filed down to the refined shape of a classy, southern belle do-good er.(I made that up... she didn't say that exactly... she used cuss words!). Really?? Nahhhhhhh......
J seems to think that my watching Dancing with the Stars and 20+ solid hours of watching the Chilean miners be rescued has ruined my love of cussing, ranting and bitching!
Has watching Dancing with the Stars turned me into my total opposite? Does what we watch on tv really show who we are? I don't think so.  I don't want to run out and by a sexy dress and run around doing the Argentine Tango. I think I'd be as graceful as David Hasselhoff and as clumsy as Margaret Cho!!! Not cool!! I just find it humorous!  These "stars" (Bristol Palin.... why are we calling her a star exactly???) go out there, some with NO dancing experience and try to be sexy and suave......  HA!!! Trust me, I did NOT find the Hoff sexy!! Funny, yes, sexy, HELL NO!!!!  I even screamed, "you fucking suck, HOFF," when he danced!!! I love comedy and this is the funniest thing next to stand-up, if you ask me.
As far as my sarcastic, cuss loving mouth...... it's still here!!! Hey, I even ranted about one of the Chilean miners yesterday before he was pulled to safety.  I had heard that his wife and mistress both were waiting for him. I just assumed he was a piece of shit like every other cheating husband. But, I had to retract that because after further investigation (I watched CNN for like 20 hours.... shut up J! ) it turns out that he and his wife of 28 years have been separated and he's had this mistress for 10 years....... kind of took the man-whore theory away from my rant.  Oh well.  I'm just trying to prove a point. 
There just hasn't really been anything worth going off about lately.  Yeah, yeah, Lindsay Lohan is at The Betty Ford Clinic..... so what. She should have been there for the last 5 years.  I'm tired of blogging/bashing these stupid little rich and famous people.  And this Snooki character..... who the fuck is she and why are we so interested in her stupid, asinine behavior?  She's a dip shit.  Like the judge who just sentenced her for disturbing the peace said, "she's a Lindsay Lohan wanna be." Miley Cyrus? Lindsay? Snooki?  Role models for our youth???  These are the people we should be warning our kids to stay away from.  I mean, how many mothers went out there and bought their daughter a "bump-itz" for their hair so they could look like Snooki (I do like saying that word.... Snooki! LOL)? Really? You think that's a good look?  Personally, I think she looks like a little  sausage stuck inside a baby sock.  She's mouthy, rude, loud..... (kind of like me, but different. I have a little class....) Grrrrr.......  She gives us Northern girls a bad reputation.  We're not all like her.  You don't have to be rude ALL the time.  Only when necessary. OK, enough about that....
Also, I've now become addicted to Twitter.  I follow mostly funny people with the same sense of humor that I have.  I follow, "Shit my dad says" and let me tell ya, that dude is hilarious!! Here's one of his Tweets: "Don't focus on the one guy who hates you. You don't go to the park and set your picnic down next to the only pile of dog shit!" Love that!!!
So, anyways, I'm still here.  Still foul mouthed. Still bitchin.  Still hatin. 
Oh, and thanks for my coffee and good conversation (bitchin'), J! And, I am forcing myself to watch Chelsea Handler tonight.  This should be interesting.

HA!!! Spell check can't find LOL but it corrected the word:: dogshit!! Apparently, I left out the space! Priceless!!

Run Forrest, Run!!!

Well, I'm back from my last beach hoo-rah of 2010. My husband and I went down to Savannah, GA for a few days.  We went over to Beaufort, SC on Friday to see Gary Sinese play with the Lt. Dan Band at the Beaufort Shrimp Festival.  It was awesome! Shrimp out the ass!!! I love it!! The Jenny (Forrest Gump's boat) was docked by the stage. It was very cool! Fun night!
Saturday was Oktoberfest on River Street in Savannah. Tons of people. The husband played with Chuck Courtenay. Again, a fun night.  TIP: vodka makes me VERY vocal and verbally abusive!! Probably should never let me drink vodka and; go to church, give a wedding toast, ask me how your new hair color/cut looks, etc.....   Just sayin.
I must say one thing though.  Savannah is not the most fashion conscious state in the country.  I'm not a fashionista by any stretch, BUT, I read enough Vogue, Marie Clair and Cosmo to know that some things, should NEVEAH leave a woman's closet. (Said with the most slippery southern drawl I could muster!) Maybe it was mostly tourists, but, look here. Marc Jacobs and many other high end stores are right there in downtown Savannah. Go look in the windows and see if anything you're wearing  even RESEMBLES anything in those windows.  If not, go home, throw all your clothes away and start from scratch, dah'ling! Oh, and the men??? Twice as bad!!! Let me dig up some examples.....

Pick one pink item. Too much=small penis

YES! These DO make you look Gay!! 

Ok, enough of that! I love Savannah, GA and hate to pick on it's people.  But please, PLEASE help these people. Well, as you probably already know, I'm in the bubble tub relaxing, blogging and criticizing. I got back to Nashville and it's freezing, so I'm also thawing out!!  I'll end this now with a few fun pics!

Gary Sinese warming up!!

Me at the beach!!

Big frigin' horse!!! With a big frigin' pee puddle!!

I want to live HERE!!!