Well, I'm super pissed that Jeanette and I don't get to go see Anjelah Johnson at Zanies' this weekend. Sold Out!!! The entire weekend....
So, I'm having my own comedy hour right here...... in the bubble tub. This girl is hysterical.....
My blogs are about whatever is ticking me off or interesting me at that moment. Usually all my posts are written from the bathtub, since THIS is where I do my best thinking!
Friday, August 27, 2010
Monday, August 16, 2010
Accessorizing the Va-jay-jay?
Somebody please tell me why the sudden obsession with blinging out the va-ja-jay? I'm reading my Cosmo, and what's on the cover? "Untamed Va-jay-jays- guess what sexy style is back?" Are you serious?? Has a va-jay-jay ever REALLY been sexy? Um, I think not.
This is the second magazine I've read, in as many months, that is talking about Vajazzling the va-jay-jay or accessorizing it with glittery applique's. WHAT????
Last month, one of my magazines even gave you templates that you could use to "landscape" the va-jay-jay in cute little shapes. Riiiiiiiiiiigggghhhhhttttt!!! How about, where the nair hits, IT'S GONE!!!
Ok, so I had no idea there were so many accessories for the va-jay-jay. First, you have your vag-bling, which is basically like bedazzling your girl parts. Nah. Or, you can go with the vag tattoo, which, also comes in glow in the dark tats. Nice. For those women who just think thier color is a little, I don't know, pale, you can find the "My New Pink Button" temporary dye. Yes, it comes in 4 different shades: Marilyn, Bettie, Audry and Ginger.(I almost bet Audrey didn't dye her cooch!) Look, I couldn't make this shit up if I tried. Now don't forget, if you have that dreaded camel toe, the Cuchini is an option. I'm not even gonna go into details.
I swear, this is crazy!! Honestly, I'm not gonna vajazzel my who-ha for ANYBODY!!! I may or may not landscape, just depends on how lazy I am the day I shave my legs. I'm certainly not going to dye it or tattoo it!! It's a funhole with hair! End of story. I'll vajazzle when I see a man naddazle! Not gonna happen my friends!!
This is the second magazine I've read, in as many months, that is talking about Vajazzling the va-jay-jay or accessorizing it with glittery applique's. WHAT????
Last month, one of my magazines even gave you templates that you could use to "landscape" the va-jay-jay in cute little shapes. Riiiiiiiiiiigggghhhhhttttt!!! How about, where the nair hits, IT'S GONE!!!
Ok, so I had no idea there were so many accessories for the va-jay-jay. First, you have your vag-bling, which is basically like bedazzling your girl parts. Nah. Or, you can go with the vag tattoo, which, also comes in glow in the dark tats. Nice. For those women who just think thier color is a little, I don't know, pale, you can find the "My New Pink Button" temporary dye. Yes, it comes in 4 different shades: Marilyn, Bettie, Audry and Ginger.(I almost bet Audrey didn't dye her cooch!) Look, I couldn't make this shit up if I tried. Now don't forget, if you have that dreaded camel toe, the Cuchini is an option. I'm not even gonna go into details.
I swear, this is crazy!! Honestly, I'm not gonna vajazzel my who-ha for ANYBODY!!! I may or may not landscape, just depends on how lazy I am the day I shave my legs. I'm certainly not going to dye it or tattoo it!! It's a funhole with hair! End of story. I'll vajazzle when I see a man naddazle! Not gonna happen my friends!!
Monday, August 2, 2010
Take this rose and shove it
Well, here we are again. The finale of The Bachelorette. Last time I blogged about this was when Ali bolted on Jake because of her job. Ok, ok, it was probably a blessing in disguise, because, I've watched the Jake and Vienna blow up, and I gotta tell ya, he's a DICK!! So, that was probably a great thing on her part.....
So, here we are on the eve of her "final rose" ceremony. I really am curious to know exactly how much time has she spent with Chris and Roberto, one on one. I mean, the show only lasts, what, two months? And in that time, she spends a lot of time with a lot of men. She's known these guy's two months and she's soooooo in love with Roberto.... ok, I've been with my husband for 5 years and I'm just finding out that he doesn't like bar soap!! Who knew??? No, this is not a reason to divorce him, but, it just goes to show that two months is an awfully short amount of time to think you've figured out how a man is going to be once you get married. Sure he's a loving, caring, romantic gentleman on tv. What makes her think that as soon as they get married he won't be sit in his La-Z-Boy, scratchin' his stuff, lettin stinky's, wiping cheeto crumbs on his underwear and belching the ABC's??? Of course they're on their best behavior. All men, AND women, act differently in the beginning of a relationship.
So, she chose Roberto..... shocker. Well, I hope they'll live happily ever after. I mean, she's run out of shows to be on, right? Well, hopefully we won't be seeing her and Roberto having a verbal, knock down drag out anytime soon.
I still think this show is nuts!!!
So, here we are on the eve of her "final rose" ceremony. I really am curious to know exactly how much time has she spent with Chris and Roberto, one on one. I mean, the show only lasts, what, two months? And in that time, she spends a lot of time with a lot of men. She's known these guy's two months and she's soooooo in love with Roberto.... ok, I've been with my husband for 5 years and I'm just finding out that he doesn't like bar soap!! Who knew??? No, this is not a reason to divorce him, but, it just goes to show that two months is an awfully short amount of time to think you've figured out how a man is going to be once you get married. Sure he's a loving, caring, romantic gentleman on tv. What makes her think that as soon as they get married he won't be sit in his La-Z-Boy, scratchin' his stuff, lettin stinky's, wiping cheeto crumbs on his underwear and belching the ABC's??? Of course they're on their best behavior. All men, AND women, act differently in the beginning of a relationship.
So, she chose Roberto..... shocker. Well, I hope they'll live happily ever after. I mean, she's run out of shows to be on, right? Well, hopefully we won't be seeing her and Roberto having a verbal, knock down drag out anytime soon.
I still think this show is nuts!!!
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